BELIEF + ACTION = CONFIDENCE
THE STRAIGHT TALK ON SELF-CONFIDENCE
How many times have you said to yourself: “It’s easy for her, she has self-confidence.” We say this as if confidence is a gift, an inheritance or a trait we are born with like the color of our skin or the shape of our eyes.
Confidence is a Belief. It’s a decision and a choice. With right action we can build confidence and lead lives of joy and success.
Let’s explore together the ways we can change our mindset from one of fear and trepidation to self-assurance and happiness.
You know the one I’m talking about. It starts like this: “My parents divorced when I was five.” “My father was an alcoholic.” “I was bullied in school.” “My grade 10 algebra teacher gave me a failing mark.” “My parents were fat. I’m fat. It’s in my genes.
That story no longer serves you. It’s a limiting belief. The first thing we must do is change our story or eliminate the story altogether. Limiting beliefs are your past. We can’t change the past, but we can change how we perceive our past.
Overcome Negative Thinking
Have you ever watched an eleven-month old baby learn to walk? She pulls herself up by grasping a hand, a chair, the edge of a table. Takes a step, lets go and plops down. She tries again and again. Sometimes for days or weeks, until finally with a huge grin she walks. She doesn’t cry, complain she’s not good enough to walk or run, her legs are too short; learning to walk is too difficult. She just does it! It’s innate. It’s in our nature to have confidence and belief.
Find that child within, the innocent one who BELIEVES in you. Stop focusing on what you cannot do, take those baby steps. Look into the mirror with utter confidence and say, “I am good enough, I’ve got this!”
Take Better Decisions
Choose someone whom you admire. If it’s business you wish to master, take someone in your field, or your company who is already where you want to be. Ask for their guidance. Successful people love to help others. It’s part of success, part of the Fifth Level of Leadership, creating new leaders. If it’s the arts, writing, music, look to those that are where you see yourself. Study what they have done to get there. Learn from the greats. Work on your craft daily. No excuses. You build confidence when your belief in your own abilities grows. Read biographies. All confident people fail over and over again until they get it right.
Steve Jobs got fired from his own company. But he believed in himself and we all know the legacy he created.
Colonel Saunders failed 1009 times before he succeeded.
Walt Disney was fired from a newspaper job because he “lacked imagination and original ideas.”
Steven Spielberg was rejected by the University of Southern California School of Cinematic Arts multiple times.
Design Your Own Success
If you don’t design your life, someone else will—in her own way.
Visualize how you see your life unfolding. Where will you live, what will you do? How does it look to you, how does it feel? Imagine yourself leading your own company, taking it public. Picture your name on the NY Times Bestseller List in 2018. Tell me what your home on the beach in Puerto Vallarta looks like. Do you have a pool boy, a masseuse and private chef? Create a vision board. Dream big. If you can dream it, you can be it.
Fill your world with positive affirmations. Don’t question them or yourself. Do it. And do it now.
Journey to Self Discovery
Every day push your limits. Make your goals HUGE. Don’t make them realistic. “Realistic” is a curse. It’s a way to keep you living a small life. Confident people have BIG goals. That’s what makes them successful. They set goals that others fear. And if they don’t make them the first time, they re-set their focus and keep on trying.
Confidence is an inside game. It’s a mindset, and a belief. And it’s a choice, your choice to make.